My Method to Slightly Mitigate the Harm of Wealth Inequality
It really pisses me off
When I see a building that’s named after
Some great former president of the institution,
Or a Civil Rights leader,
Or a ground-breaking scientist,
Instead of the most heinous rich person you can imagine.
Hear me out.
Think about how cheap your dorm would be
If it was called Bill Cosby Hall.
Let’s take advantage of the guilt of the wealthy.
If Pharma Bro wants to repair his image,
Let him pay to name a hospital;
Everyone will call it some asinine nickname anyway.
I don’t know who the fuck these buildings are named after in the first place,
But I know healthcare is expensive.
In short, I wouldn’t take my kids to Epstein Island,
But I’d take them to the Epstein Elephant Sanctuary
(If it was five bucks cheaper).
Owen Penhollow is a junior at the University at Buffalo studying economics, philosophy, political science, and mathematics. He writes things that make him giggle at least once. Sometimes they are also meaningful (albeit rarely). In his free time, he enjoys self-deprecating humor and malapropisms.